This is the first email I got. I swear, I didn't tamper with it in ANY way. Nor have I tampered with any of the other emails he sent me.

Email 1:

Good Day,my real name is Heero Yuy. Myself and my comrades have been quietly been working on building the Gundam mobile suits and the space colonies for five years. I have been looking around for good artists to draw up the final plans for both the colonies and the mobile suits, and I have found that you are a good artist.My team would like you to join our ranks. If you would like more information, do not hesitate to ask. Yours Sincerely,Heero Yuyand the men and women working with us in Op: Gundam.

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Now, most of the time, I'd just delete something like that. But I was in a pretty good mood, and feeling rather sarcastic, so I replied with:

Dude.

Just dude.

I mean, my gawd, you've odviously never seen any of my art to consider that I'm a good artist. Oh, and which space colonies? Mir fell and the ISS is kinda limping along with limited funding. I mean, if you guys are building a space colony in secret, it must be a hell of a cover up. Oh wait, we're all in the Matrix anyways, so it's possible! Will your Gundam doing the Shining Fingers attack? Or something like the rocket punch the Dai Guard uses? And are you by any chance related to Bill Gates? I mean, you'd need that kind of funding to do this project. You did say ask for more info, so those are my questions. I would kind need this cleared up before I commited to anything. Yeah. Definatly need that cleared up. Send me the answers and as much money as you can fit in an attachment, and we'll talk. Ja!

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He actually wrote me back!! Which really surprised me. So, just for the heck of it, I decided to see how long I could string him along. *snicker*

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Email 2:

Which answers would you like, I cannot tell much, except that I am merely doing this in coalition with top secret connections to the USSS (US Secret Service), USArmy and the USAF (US Air Force).

Response:

Top secret, eh? Wow, I must have a higher security clearance then I thought. Which is really weird to me because I've never been in the military. Must've been handed down to me by my dad. He was one of the top ranking generals in the Navy. I guess I'll have to ask him why he never mentioned this to me. He knows I'm a fan of Gundam.

Anyhoo, just pick a couple of those questions you can answer and get back to me. Oh, and I noticed you forgot the attachment. That's ok, just don't forget it next time, OK? After all, I'm a poor college graduate with no career job yet. I gotta have something to tide me over until I get a real job.

Oh, and do you need pilots? I have a couple of friends that have built their own Gundam simulatiors and are ace pilots now. I tried it, but I have motion sickness, so I had trouble telling up from down. But I know they would be very interested, espically since they've been working on plans for their own Gundam and are currently needing funding for their project. I'm sure your rich uncle Bill would be happy to help. ^_^

Email 3:

Mi'lady,If your friends truely are interested, tell them to email me and I'll get back to them.Regarding your questions; They do not seem to be serious enough for any concern or answer. If you truely want information, think up some questions that have a serious tone and I'll give it some thought.We in Operation Gundam only sap at the Military fundings, meaning we had no idea about your family or friends; But do remember this - - we are a secret organisation and are permitted to kill anyone who knows outside of these emails or without being "let in" on this matter. Sincerest Regards,Heero Yuy.

Response:

Right.

You odviously really don't know anything about me to call me 'lady'. -_-; My questions were quite serious. After all, if you don't have good funding, they how will I ever get paid? And I would need to know about your Gundam's abilities to make sure it doesn't violate a patent application put in by my friends. You know, the ones that built the simulator? They would be interested in piloting a Gundam should yours be built first, so I will give them your email, since you suggested it. I'm sure the rest of the Metal Gear Team would be a bit miffed, since they're the only pilots that are trained at this point, but I'm sure you can find your way clear to paying them more then their current funders are.

As for the last bit of your email, I do not apprecate being threatened. You should know that I also have contacts, and so you can understand that your attmept to frighten me has only put me in a delicate position. I'm sure my friends would love to have a chat with you if you try anything, and as I see that you were *ahem* silly enough to use Yahoo as your way to contact me, they will have no trouble tracking you down.

Email 4:

Firstly, my apologies, but we are working in secret you have to remember; telling too much to a -possible- member could put us in serious trouble. Also I've been a little busy, so I apologise for not e-mailing until now. My Fundings are from a close friend of mine who is top Military Rank and working in the pentagon. But tell me Miss, how do you plan to track me down if I'm not in one place at any one time?

Response:

Heeerrooooo!! (editor's note: my roomate dared me to put that in there. i couldn't resist!!) Honestly! First you tell me that you want to let me into your organization to draw for you, then you refuse to tell me anything about it! Tease, tease, tease! After all, how am I supposed to commit to anything when you won't tell me anything? If you want assurances, I don't really have any except that I promise to let you flashy-thing me if you feel you need to. Besides, who's going to believe me? Gundam is supposedly just an anime. One of us is going to have to start trusting here! And since it's you who wants me, I guess that means you have to start. I have obligations of my own, you know, and I just can't toss them aside for a -possible- contract of any kind. Besides, you haven't even brought up how much you're willing to pay me. I'll grant that you have funding, but I do stuff for free. You never did attach the money I asked you to, so how can I be sure you're actually serious about this? Seems to me that all you're doing is dangling a project in front of me and asking me to trust that you're telling me the truth. I ain't doing that again. I got burned before, so I'm always cautious now. Don't worry about taking so long to get back to me; I know exactly how that goes! ^_^;

Oh, and don't 'Miss' me, pal. I don't need to know where you are on the computer. I just need to know where you sleep.

Email 5:

Ma'am,
I do not know of anyway to address you. but if you open the attachment, you'll see that we mean business, that is your share of pay, One Million US Dollars safely locked in an underground vault. If I have your attention and not your sarcasm, I may be able to tell you more. Besides, no job has it's assurances on the front desk, if they do then it's not good security. Think about my proposal seriously and give me a straight non-sarcastic reply.

Response:

Ok, you know, I do have a name. I'm not going to mind if you use it. After all, that's why people are given names.

And you finally realized I was being sarcastic? Gee, only took you four emails. Read the first one again. It should be odvious that I was mocking you. Let me give you some free advice. This kind of thing does not work on me. No, I don't believe you. And I do have several reasons why:

1. That kind of technology is simply not available yet. Now, granted, a full scale mobile suit is being built right now. However, it will not be capable of battle. It'll move, yes, but that's about it. The makers just want to see if it's possible.

2. Gundanium does not exist. From what I understand in all the Gundam series is that it can only be mined in outer space. We're barely able to keep people alive in outer space, much less make anything in it.

3. Every job has assurances on the front end. If you wish to hire people, you must be able to tell them little things like how they're going to get paid and where they'll be working. That's just good business sense. If you can't even tell me where you are based at or how it's even possible to build what is impossible at this time to build, how do you expect me to believe you?

4. I am not an artist. I took one art class in 7th grade. In fact, I'll even attach my attempt at drawing a Gundam that I did a while back to show you I'm not an artist! If you were a serious organization, you would be doing your recruiting from the ranks of the professional drafters and artists, of which I bow down and pay tribute to their abilities. They can do technical drawings, which are certainly needed for this kind of job. I sketch. Rather badly, I might add. If you're looking for someone to color other people's stuff, I can that. But other than that, there's not much I can do in the art category.

If you're still with me, and you really are serious, I expect some real information from you. I do not accept jobs on faith, nor am I so gullible that I believe every story that I'm told. Especially if it's through email. If you are a serious organization, you would be willing to provide me with actual facts, rather then flattery and intrigue. Since you have not been able to tell me anything, I simply do not believe you.

Now, if the entire purpose of this was to get me to draw some fan art, I'll be happy to oblige you. I'm not an artist, but I do like to sketch. However, if you're still under the impression that you really are Heero Yuy, I suggest seeking professional help. Imagination is a fine and wonderful thing, but you seem to be taking it too far. I suggest getting your head out from under the rock you've crawled under before it falls and squishes out the few remaining brain cells you have left. If you want to reply, feel free. But you should know I've disarmed stupider people than you. After all, I've had plenty of practice and I'm very good at it. I do not appreciate that you seem to think I'm some naive idiot that will believe anything anyone tells her through email. If you wish to continue this charade, then go right ahead. I welcome the change to practice. Oh, and get a real job. Then you'll know what I was talking about above.

BTW: Thanx for the image. I laughed for ten minutes when I saw that. Especially since I've seen it before!

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Needless to say, I never heard back from him. I was a little disappointed, espically because I spent a lot of time laughing about this, but I suppose all good things must end.